Javier Claure Covarrubias - Negra blanca (French translation)

Proofreading requested

Negra blanca

Una mujer negra pasea por el boulevard,
entra a una tienda, se maquilla
y sale blanca.
Una mujer blanca pasea por el boulevard,
entra a la misma tienda
y sale negra.
La negra lleva una cartera,
la blanca una sombrilla.
la primera se mide ropa interior
y su pierna se queda en el sofá;
la segunda compra un chocolate
y su brazo se queda en el mostrador.
Ambas se miran, no se hablan, pero se sonríen;
cada cual se desvía por su camino,
la negra de anchas caderas descansa en un banco,
la blanca observa una vitrina.
La pierna y el brazo se juntan
formando un cuadro blanco-negro,
la pierna obstruye el tráfico,
el brazo con amabilidad saluda;
la negra quiere su pierna,
la blanca su brazo;
las dos conversan con sus respectivos novios,
sin cartera y sin sombrilla que les moleste.
Submitted by Valeriu Raut on Sat, 02/12/2017 - 19:38
Align paragraphs
French translation

Noire blanche

Une femme noire se promène dans le boulevard,
elle entre dans une boutique, se maquille
et sort blanche.
Une femme blanche se promène dans le boulevard,
entre dans la même boutique
et sort noire.
La noire tient un portefeuille,
la blanche un parasol.
La première se mesure la lingerie
et sa jambe reste sur le sofa ;
la seconde achète un chocolat
et son bras reste sur le comptoir.
Les deux se regardent, elles ne parlent pas, mais elles sourient ;
chacune s'écarte de son chemin,
le noire, large de hanches, se repose sur un banc,
la noire observe une vitrine.
La jambe et le bras se joignent
et font un tableau blanc-noir,
la lambe bloque la circulation,
le bras salue avec amabilité ;
La noire veut sa jambe,
la blanche son bras ;
chacune s'entretient avec son fiancé,
sans portefeuille et sans parasol qui ne les dérange.
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Submitted by michealt on Tue, 13/02/2018 - 16:37
Added in reply to request by Valeriu Raut
Last edited by michealt on Mon, 19/02/2018 - 12:27
Author's comments:

Cela m'apparaît plutôt bizarre.

The author of translation requested proofreading.
It means that he/she will be happy to receive corrections, suggestions etc about the translation.
If you are proficient in both languages of the language pair, you are welcome to leave your comments.
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Valeriu Raut    Wed, 14/02/2018 - 11:24

Bonjour Tom et merci.

Negra blanca > Femme noire ???

sin cartera y sin sombrilla que les moleste > sans porteDeuille et sans parasol, ce qui les dérange.

Je comprends autrement :
sans portefeuille et sans parasol qui les dérange.

michealt    Thu, 15/02/2018 - 11:25

Thanks, Vale

The Lorrainnian pocket pothole fountain (I guess that's what "portedeuille" means) was a misprint, not intentional. But ", ce" was silly, you are quite right - the parasol was a nuisance, not the absence of the parasol and the pocket book.

The wromg title was just plain laziness (I didn't put the title in at first, got reminded when I hit submit, and instead of looking up the spanish title I just took it from the first line of the translation, which of course was wrong because the noun in the first line is not the same as the title.